بلّو کی منگنی ھونے والی ھے۔ میں نے چھیڑا کہ بلّو کا منگیتر پبلشر ھے ، اس لیے انگوٹھی پر "جملہ حقوق محفوظ ھیں" ضرور لکھوائیں

حمّو تو تمھیں یاد ھو گی۔ اس کی شادی پر ھم سب لوگ گئے تھے۔ سنا ھے کہ لڑکے نے اعتراض کیا کہ نہ تو رسوم ادا کی جائیں اور نہ باجا گاجا ھو۔ خاموشی سے سب کچھ ھو جائے۔ توبہ کیسا ھونق لڑکا ھوگا۔ شادی ھو رھی ھے یا کوئی چوری کر رھے ھیں۔ ولایت سے ابھی ابھی آیا ھے، اس لیے دماغ درست نھیں ھے۔ لیکن کون سنتا ھے۔ رسمیں ساری ھوئیں - مانجھے بٹھانا، کنگنا باندھا، مہندی لگانا، مسالہ پسوانا، پانی بھروانا۔ تمھیں خوشی ھو گی کہ مہر تین لاکھ مقرر ھوا ھے اور ڈیڑھ ھزار روپے جیب خرچ لکھا گیا ھے۔ حمّو کتنی خوش نصیب ھے۔ باقی کی رسمیں بھی ادا کی گئیں۔ چوتھی کھیلنا، دلھن کی جوتی دولھا کے کندھے پر لگانا، آرسی مصحف کرنا، دولھا کے سر پر بہنوں کا آنچل ڈالنا، دولھا کو زعفران کے بہانے مرچیں کھلا دینا، دولھا کے جوتے چرا لینا، پھر دولھا کو الٹی چارپائی سے گرا دینا، اس کی شیروانی پلنگ سے سی دینا، میراثنوں کا بیھودہ گانے گانا، بڑا لطف رھا۔ دولھا بھی ایک چغد نکلا۔ جنم نہ دیکھا بوریا سپنے آئی کھاٹ۔ سنا ھے کہ نکاح کے فوراً بعد کہیں فرار ھو گیا۔ بڑی مشکلوں سے ڈھونڈ کر لائے۔ پتہ نہیں اّج کل کے لڑکے کیسے ھو گئے ھیں۔ یھی رسومات تو قوموں کے زندہ رھنے کی نشانیاں ھیں۔ دولھا نے مہر میں بھی مین میخ نکالی کہ بیس ھزار کا جو جھیز لڑکی کو دے رھے ھیں یہ اپنے پاس رکھئے اور تین لاکھ کی رقم کم کر کے مہر کو اور کچھ نہیں تو دو لاکھ اسّی ھزار ھی کر دیجیے۔ لاحول ولا قوۃ


شفیق الرحمٰن کی "مزید حماقتیں" سے اقتباس ___

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Yayyyyy!!! My bloggie is 8 years old now :D

*feels overwhelmed*

*wipes those tears of happiness*

*gulps*

Readers and Readresses, I really can't imagine I've been sitting on this space for more than 8 years now!! EIGHT OLDIE YEARS!! Yep, the anniversary was on Nov 30th, but this rusty Dinky Mind forgot to celebrate it on that day, so it's been 8 years and ... *counts on fingers* ... 3 days now! :D 

*hyperventilates*

Oh God, I still can't forget the day when I started this blog. Famma, all the credit goes to you for introducing me to the world of Blogistan. I can never thank you enough :') My enthusiasm might have reduced a tad bit, but it will always be there!!!

Concluding my speech, I'd like to state that in a few days, when hopefully I'd be free, I'd adorn this blog with a new template and some better features and add-ons, so my readers could enjoy their time here :)

I hope these 8 years extend to ∞ years ;) 

*wipes another tear of joy*

You may now clap ;)

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I've got my Convocation ceremony in 12 hours now. I was talking to a 6th grader earlier today and was telling him about my Convocation and university life.

Me: Tomorrow will be my Convocation ceremony. I'm so happy :)
Him: Oh yeah, you told me yesterday you'd be wearing a black frock!
Me: Huh? FROCK? No!! I said I'd be wearing a black gown and a black cap ... and, yes, a blue sash too.
Him: So it's like a farewell party?
Me: No, not exactly a party, but farewell, yes! It's actually something less than a party and more of a... an emotional day.
Him: Ah, so you're going to a funeral!

*facepalm*

That's the advantage of being a kid. Free imagination and you can drag it into any direction you want, and no one would even argue!

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I've quit eating cream cheese
I've quit licking chocolate-hazelnut spread
I've reduced my meals to 1.5 a day, rather than full 3
I've cut down my oil intake
I've stopped having fizzy drinks
I'm on those grape fruits, bananas, cucumbers, yogurt and all those fresh things that are bound to help me out in this crucial time
I've also started workouts
Like skipping rope
And stupid walk
And what do you call that lame exercise that my sis told me about...

AND STILL

That stupid, lame, idiotic, nonsensical, and ultra crappy weighing machine showed my weight as 2 Kgs plus the previous one!!!! Like HOW!!! That's a total scare!!! I'm dead sure I'm inhaling some pretty dense air!

And to make things worse, one day my sis commented "Oh dang! Look at these fat-laden arms of yours!!! Kia thoonsing these days?"

And my fiancé said, "What are you hiding in your inflated cheeks?" when there was just nothing!!! :( *sobs sobs*

Enough with this diet drama! I don't know what got into me and I started acting all foolish! I'm officially putting an end to this diet fever and will resume with my regular, 'balanced', breakfast from tomorrow, i.e., a plate full of ultra greasy, chaat-masala laden french fries, complimented with a rich garlic dip and a big mug of highly lemony green tea!

I'm also going to have my junk food whenever I'd want. And I'd also have a spoonful (or two) of chocolate spread whenever I'd be tensed, tired, or just in the mood of having it.

Most of all, I'm crossing out the word "weighing machine" from my dictionary.

Diet - End, Finish, Fin, Finito, Nishta, Khallas!!!

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Uh, so today was the last day of my 12-week traineeship at L&F. And what an amazing experience it was. 12 weeks passed in the flick of an eye. Today it was a very fun-packed, yet gloomy day for me. So while I sniff my nose and quietly weep behind the couch, why don't you guys check my desk pictures. I wish I could post those memorable pictures of ours as well, but, umm, I might upload them on facebook. Might.

Left-to-right view of my desk. See that paper pen-holder? I proudly made it and happily gave it away to N :)

I'm so going to miss all those post-it notes that always helped my Dinky Mind to stay active. And my Aussie kangaroo placed right in front of me too :') Oh, and see those capsules in a slender bottle? Only 3 people know what it actually had! Haha :D

This was my favorite side of soft-board :) I had my tiny 2-paged phone directory, my favorite quotes that always motivated me and my huge "IBA Class of 2011" mug. Coffee tasted much more heavenly in it :)

This was the rear side of my desk. And I made a smile there. Know why? That's cuz whenever I used to turn around to look at my supervisor, he would, sort of, glare at me sometimes and this smile helped a lot in balancing my mood out! Thank you, dear smiley :)

 And that's while packing all things up and leaving in a while :( Notice that post-it note having etc written on it? Well, that's end of thinking capacity! So apt!

Thanks a million L&F for making my stay so memorable. And thanks a million & one USAID for placing me there!

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So here I come again with another of my workplace stories.

For the first few days of joining office I didn't know what my phone extension was. So, on the third day, when Dinky Mind finally started working, I dialled zero, and asked the receptionist what my extension was. 180. Wrote this on a Post-it note and pasted it on my phone set so if anyone asks I could tell them without putting my tiny brain through recall-trauma. I also made a one-page post-it extension directory and pinned it on my soft board above the phone (sadly, we don't have glass panels to stick post-it notes on).

So, the real story began 4 days ago when my phone rang and I picked it up:

Me: "Hello!"

Caller: *pause* "Umm... okay, sorry!"

and the line goes dead.

Next day:

Me: "Hello!"

Caller: *baffled* "Uh... oh!"

and the line goes dead.

Another day:

Me: "Hello!"

Caller: *silence*

and the line goes dead.

On the other day:

Me: "Hello!"

Caller: *pause* "Umm... is this Mr. XYZ?"

Before I could even think of a reply, he'd hang up, realizing what a silly question he asked!

And a second later, I would hear the same voice yelling, "Mr. XYZ, isn't your extension 180?"

And a distant voice would respond, "Nah, 181!"

Grrrr... Hello! Make a directory!!! Or borrow one from someone and get it copied! And also pin it up on your board! It's so annoying. The desk I'm using was not occupied by anyone for the past few months. And so was the phone. And so 180! I sometimes wish to have a Caller ID on my phone. :( I hope I don't get such "accidental" calls again :/

Cheerio folks!

PS: Do I really sound like a Mr.? :(

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Till this moment I thought my phone had some issues, but when I called Ufone's helpline, I changed my opinion. When I dialled 333, I was greeted with a female robotic voice giving me really good news - "Respected user, this is to inform you that from July 15th, the charges for calling Ufone helpline have increased to Rs.1, exclusive of taxes. And if you want to talk to our service centre representative, then it would cost you additional Rs. 1, exclusive of taxes. Please dial 1 for...." I wish I could vent my anger out at the mechanic voice!

Anyway, I pressed zero, as it would direct me to the service centre representative. Thankfully he picked up on the 3rd bell, and greeted me by my father's name [my sim card is registered on his name]. I explained him the problem (if you remember, I once talked about my phone not able to send txt messages) and he, very professionally, asked me the cell phone model, and how many messages I had in my inbox and outbox. He also asked me to delete all the sent messages, check the message centre number and restart the phone. He said he just sent a message centre number on my phone (and I did hear a beep). So when I held up and checked the 2 txts on my phone, I found them both to be from Ufone about their silly and ultra stupid services!!! There was NO message center number anywhere in any of the txts! You can't believe how blood-boiling it was. I've been facing this problem for the past 5 days and silly, irresponsible Ufone reps are so darn unhelpful, it's plainly... ARGH!!!

Needless to say, I checked the message center number, deleted the sent messages, restarted my phone and since it's Ufone, the problem persisted! I even restored the phone to factory settings, but still, no success. Now I'd go home, charge my phone and call that silly guy again to text me the message centre number and not promotional SMSs.

It seems like in my life its a rule to talk to one silly person a day *sigh* :(

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The first thing you notice when you walk into my office (which you won't) is the whiteness (or call it 'seriousness' in better words), and, aslso please add, the mind-numbing chill. It certainly wouldn't be wrong to call this place Mini Moscow. The moment I sit on my desk, I can feel all the evil AC ducts directed towards me and my poor nails start turning blue in 2 seconds. Even my lime-green jumper (yes, there are certain advantages of working in a sourcing company) fails to keep me completely cozy. It's of no use even when I try to stretch the poor sleeve down to my hands. Seems like I might need to buy a pair of woollen gloves real soon.

Believe it or not, this cold literally jams everything! My brain, my hands, my feet, my cellphone! *shivers* Trust me, typing becomes a real challenge in this mind-blowing chill. My feet freeze even when im wearing woollen socks and shoes. They become so numb, sometimes it feels like I don't even have feet :( Scary! And that's not just it. My cellphone can also feel that chill and it has now stopped functioning properly. Poor thing can't send txt msgs anymore. RIP, my dear N82. :( I hope I don't get any serious ailment during my stay here :(

The most striking thing about this place is that everything is so white, so dry and so very plain that sometimes I just wish I could paint all these walls in lilac-and-pink stripes (or any other color, if you want). I've planned I'm going to personalize my desk real soon. And I'd make sure it has more colors other than just lime-green (jumper) and yellow (post-it notes).  

Enough rants for today. If they can't let me paint the walls, I can just make my desk colorful. And I'm sure I can then start loving work here ;)

Cheerio folks!

PS: I'm writing this post in my lunch break. Promise!

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